maybe i should just let it go
release this grip i've held for so long
but the visions still haunt me
you were always so wrong

that loving aunt, everyone loved her
vicious old bitch, everyone loved her
she picked on me.. made fun of me
i was so young.. everyone loved her

upstanding young cousin
why can't i be like him, they said
fucking retard, incapable of anything
but he still laughs at me..

i'm a disgrace to the family tree
god fucking forbid i should ever think
i want to be a shallow asshole just like you
i want to be an upstanding racist christian

just like.. you.

it's always something, you've always got a bitch
something about my hair or clothes or some other worthless shit
but i let it pass on by, or at least i try
but it's so hard when i just wish that you'd hurry up and die.

if you could just see things the way i see
you'd understand why i could never be
anything like you.  i don't want to be like you.
you're just as ashamed of yourself as i am of you.

you're a disgrace.  you're ashamed.
you don't want to think cause you're afraid
to look in the water and see your face.
staring back at your own disgrace.

-

cp.