Gotta watch wapner. Gotta watch wapner. N E C R O N I T E - Welcome to Remorse #18. This is the first time I have written an NFO file in over three years, since Remorse #2. I'm actually even drawing again, every once in a while... It's been a long time since I did anything for any group. Much has happened with Remorse this month. Lots of personnel shifts, six new members: Dead Soul, Nine Lives, Phreak Klass (returning), Revolution, Truman 5tarr, Computerman. I won't even go into the personnel shifts... uggh.. not enough time to do that before I go to bed =) -- time to hand this off to Necrom, yo. -- Necronite {remorse} P A R I A H - Since Remorse #17 was released a minor change has been made regarding newschool applications. Tum (who was already a senior) and I approached Mark with the idea of handling all newschool applications, recruiting all newschool members, and in general being responsible for anything that has to do with newschool ascii in Remorse (along with Necromancer of course). Mark liked the idea and gave it his approval. What does this mean for those of you considering applying? Instead of sending your application to any Remorse member you'll now send it to Necromancer, Tum, or myself and we will consult each other and collectively accept/reject your application. For the most part newschool applications should be directed to Tum (tum81@hotmail.com) or myself (pariah@alienz.org). For those of you that have a short attention span I'll run it by you again. If you're considering applying to Remorse as a newschool asciist send your application to Tum (tum81@hotmail.com) or myself (pariah@alienz.org). We will then ask Necromancer what he thinks and accept/reject your application. I'll let Tum take it from here.. -- Pariah == pariah@alienz.org T H E U P R I G H T M A N - Pariah pretty much summed it all up. Remorse is going through some major changes and we're actively recruiting. If you want us to respond to your E-mail as soon as possible, remember to include your e-mail address, current affiliations, whether or not you'd be willing to drop it all for Remorse, and, of course, a minimum of five of your best logo's/pictures. Remorse is back, and with a vengeance. And remember, the secret password to get automatically accepted is "Ickle me, Tickle me, Pickle me, Dickle me too." We will try to respond to all applications as soon as possible. If you are a dreamer, come in, If you are a dreamer, a wiser, a liar, A hoper, a prayer, a magic bean buyer, If you're a pretender, come sit by my fire For we have some flax-golden tales to spin. Come in! Come in! -The Upright Man tum81@hotmail.com N E C R O M A N C E R - Alright, this time around, I'll write last. I'm here to let you know that I've pretty much admitted that yes, I DO need help in running a group. And since I've admitted this little fact, I've found something out: Help is good. TUM and Pariah have single-handedly turned our newschool section around, and increased the overall quality and production of the group tenfold. For this, you both have my eternal thanks. I actually don't know if there's anything useful for me to add to this NFO, but hey, I feel like doing something other than putting it together. :) Here. Bands listened to while composing/editing this NFO and pack: Front Line Assembly, NWA, Decree, Skinny Puppy, Carcass, Bile, Pitch Shifter, Wu-Tang, Numb and Mozart. Ahh.. which reminds me. Defrimental actually joined the group at one point, produced a couple of asciis under the Remorse label, and then decided to leave the group. Why? Well.. from what I saw, he felt like he had left his Odelay brethren behind -- so he went back to them, I assume. Good luck Def, and it was fun having you for those few short days. :) Also, we have a couple of guests this pack, and a magic appearance from Fractal! Fractal hasn't released ascii in QUITE a while, but he's a brutha, he rocks, and so we're here for him. And in addition to Fractal guesting (well.. sort of a re-appearance, not really a guest, considering he is a member), we have Subsonic and Volatile guesting in this month's pack! w00p! - Necromancer.Remorse F O U N D E R Necromancer S E N I O R S T A F F Necronite, Pariah, The Upright Man T Y R O N E C O O R D Empty A R T I S T S Arrogance, aXB, Bad Spirit, Blackdawn, Black Jack, Cannabis, Computerman, Dead Soul, Merlin, The Messiah, Nine Lives, Omicron, Phreak Klass, Revolution, Seismic, Serial Toon, SpeedFreak, Spinsane, Truman 5tarr A L U M N I Enigmatic, Fahrenheit, Hiro Protagonist, Kaleidas, Megga Hertz, Mr. Kite, Terminator 2, Whodini And for your viewing pleasure.. some IRC quotes. Ok, it's tacky, I know, but oh well. They're amusing. (elmaestro) ok, lemme rephrase this question.. WHAT ARE YOU ALL THANKFUL FOR BESIDES ANSI RELATED SHIT! (nMANCEr) I'm thankful for my boogers, because they protect the vulnerable inner lining of my nostrils. (r-bugsy) [dyone(scott@sial128.bc1.com)] fuck, wopface, i give you my ascii, i give you free room and board, i cook and clean for you, and this is how you repay me? (r-bugsy) [dyone(scott@sial128.bc1.com)] Anyhow, go buy some antiseptic mouthwash. your breath smells like shit, you garlic-chewing wop mESSIAH: My name is NOT Marc. That's short for Marcus. And if you rearrange the letters in Marcus, you get Suc Ram. (omiTRKY81) I had this long conversation with this girl about my penis (omiTRKY81) but she probably didnt even want to talk about it (r-bugsy) im sure it was more of a short talk (mESSIAH81) If I'm an idiot, you're necronite (necronite) my nipple hurts (_sodium/#remorse) oh my god. IM THE ONLY PERSON WITHOUT OPS IM SURROUNDED BY AN ULTRA-POWERFUL OLIGARCHY.. ASCII ARTISTS TOWERING OVER ME.. TAUNTING ME... WITH THEIR OPS BUT NOT KICKING.. LETTING ME GRILL IN MY OWN SWEAT.. WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS? .x%> Mode change "-o pariahFAT" on channel #remorse by: r-bugsy. (r-bugsy/#remorse) he's on your side, now. (hIRO-81) yeah, all of you wish you were black like me.. (hIRO-81) cos then you'd have a big dick (hIRO-81) or at least big ears (r-bugsy) i have a big dick, jaggy. (cash) Hey I got a big dick AND big ears at the dollar store. (nMANCEr) HAH! LITTLE DO YOU KNOW THAT I ALREADY HAVE BIG EAR.. er.. dick. (omiTRKY81) tr; did you compile a kernel with a sound driver for that card? and did you set the IRQ/DMA/etc/etc shit right? (tEAtEW) kernel? (wise-kid) I'm doing National Diploma in Business Computing :)) (nMANCEr) National Diploma? In New Zealand? (nMANCEr) Do they like.. teach you how to shear sheep? (nMANCEr) wise-k: But I'll tell you this, there's nothing quite like the feeling of a shorn scrotum. (stoOn`81) i'll probably never get a fucken quote. (stoOn`81) now i go get dressed. (nMANCEr) Dressed? (nMANCEr) WHO NEEDS CLOTHING WHEN YOU CAN BASK IN THE COMFORTING GLOW FROM YOUR MONITOR WHILE DRAWING ASCII?! (stoOn`81) i have school soon :( (nMANCEr) Oh yeah, I forgot. You're a goddamn canuck, and you don't have Thanksgiving, like real people. (nMANCEr) MARTZ!#%@ (nMANCEr) MARTZ ISN'T CANADIAN#%@% (mARTSIX5) oHSEVEN, nECROMANCER!! ;) (mARTSIX5) sure i'm not, i'm a jew. (nMANCEr) Are you saying that there aren't any Canadian Jews? "ohseven!@*" We may have to take martz out -- I think he's Canadian. #ohseven(shichi-do@*com)(03:48AM)# GASP?!~ A spy? -> "ohseven!@*" THE BASTARD -> "ohseven!@*" I'LL GET HIS PENGUIN, YOU GO FOR THE SLED + ohseven slowly sneaks over to MARTSIX5 and grabs the sled from under his ass. + nMANCEr sneaks past shrimp while martz has his attention on him and delivers a swift blow to his penguin's neck -- killing the vile beast. (discypeLF) here's this week's goth chick. her name is MeggaHertz. (nMANCEr) oned: Rest assured, if my poop ever needs packing, you'll be the first person I go to. (milkmang) is awe out? (nMANCEr) Bah. I know not. (nMANCEr) I care not for the trivaltries of of the ansi scene. I am only here to display my vulgar power of +o. (nMANCEr) A demonstration is neccessary. *** You have been kicked off channel #ansi by nMANCEr (.:%dreadX.Behold the power) .x%> nMANCEr (necrom@*ba.best.com) has joined channel #ansi .x%> Topic for #ansi set by nMANCEr : Not only do my balls itch, but my legs are sweating too. It's the longjohns. (troopa) [nMANCEr] WHAT FOOLHARDY MORTAL THINKS HE CAN SHELVE FASTER THAN I? (nMANCEr) That's right. Fear my godlike shelving skills and my super-human speed with which I /k. (dem-:#best) I don't have a single unix box any more. I'm rapidly heading to management, since I seem to need to know less and less actual technical information. (nMANCEr:#best) Uhoh. (errata:#best) scary. (dem-:#best) soon, my hair will be pointy and I will be demanding status reports. (errata:#best) we'll have to start shunning you. (nMANCEr:#best) We'll have to put you out of your misery soon. (errata:#best) *shun* *shun* (dem-:#best) "justify your time!" + Schrade turns his back on dem- + dem- writes DEM WUZ HERE on ken's back. (Schrade:#best) hehe + errata draws an arrow pointing down dyone ; nah dude, my prostate could pull a sick cow out of a 80foot ravine man, its strong who needs a helicopter when you've got a prostate? (dyone) my brother screams the word "jizz" and "cum" in front of my mom (dyone) it's a riot (dyone) dear god. it doesn't get any more foul than seeing jpegs of an obese black chick with milk poured on her ass (mESSIAH__) dyone ; dood, let me share the foulness! (dyone) messiah - i don't have any links. i'm just reminiscing about the good old days. (dyone) jesus! who thinks up these pron banners? "cum baptize my face with your spunk!!!"... intellects everywhere (compuman_) I'm 5'5.. (dyone) well, that's what you get, having Joe Pesci for a dad and all (nMANCEr) Jeez, yer a cute little munchkin with a little nub nose and a bouncey bottom! (nMANCEr) *** You are user 69 out of a maximum of 200 users. (nMANCEr) *** It is currently Thu Dec 4 07:30:02 1997 in Provo, Utah. (nMANCEr) I RULE (ohseven) i fear (nMANCEr) I RULE I RULE [omiClaus] (nMANCEr): SCORE! [omiClaus] (nMANCEr): DON'T DISCONNECT!$ EVER (nMANCEr) ALRIGHT (nMANCEr) I'm compiling like a madman, phear me. (nMANCEr) I'm compiling on my Sparc20 here at work, telnetting to my home machine and compiling on THAT, telnetting to qpt.com and compiling THERE (nMANCEr) I ROCK (nMANCEr) I AM THE COMPILE MASTER (nMANCEr) OOOH I CAN HARDLY WAIT TO "MAKE INSTALL" (jwhyne) MAKE INSTALL!!!!!!!!!! (nMANCEr) No. (nMANCEr) Must not rush. (nMANCEr) Slow and steady wins the compiling race. (nMANCEr) I must first pray to Compilana, the God of Good Compiles. (nMANCEr) Pray for a safe deliverance to the land of New Software, where all dance in glee. (nMANCEr) FUCK (nMANCEr) ERRORS (nMANCEr) MY PRAYERS GO UNHEEDED. (nMANCEr) I DENOUNCE YOU, COMPILANA, GOD OF NO GOOD COMPILES (PetrDoubt) You pray to the wrong gods. (nMANCEr) What Gods would you have me pray to, oh Peter that doth doubt? (PetrDoubt) Hail Eris, goddess of all that frustrates. (nMANCEr) Ye heathenous Gods of Apple, perhaps? (nMANCEr) UNPIOUS PAGAN! I SPIT UPON THE GROUND YOU HAVE WALKED AND CURSE YOUR PROGENY FOR 10 GENERATIONS. (nMANCEr) This angers me. I was looking forward to KDE, as opposed to this aesthetically-displeasing CDE that doth plague the very soul of my SparcStation. (cdy) cde isn't too bad (nMANCEr) You just like CDE because it's almost cdy. (cdy) haha (nMANCEr) Yeah. You laff. (cdy) Damnit quit spreading rumours (cdy) ;) (nMANCEr) But I'm the one sitting here in my miserable CDE-infected state, having no visually-please coolness to ease my tired eyes and my strained back. (nMANCEr) Pleasing, damnit. (nMANCEr) Visually-pleasing, for the love of God. (nMANCEr) CDE angers me so much that it has cursed me with typographical errors. (nMANCEr) This lack of a successful compile has placed me in a foul mood. I believe I shall cut several people off on the way home, to alleviate the stress. [errata] nMANCE: cut off that win95 wabi guy's.. oh.. nevermind. (nMANCEr) errata: He shall be the first person that wishes I was going slow enough to see their defiantly-yet-uselessly raised middle finger. [jwhyne] nMANCEr: just shut up (nMANCEr) jwhyne: SILENCE! (jwhyne) NO!! (nMANCEr) Or be silenced, like the foul Windows 95 wench that you are. (jwhyne) NEVER! (jwhyne) i don't use windows95 (nMANCEr) Ah, but that is where you are wrong, oh non-believing one. (nMANCEr) For you see, in your Microsoft-ridden life, you have been so delusioned that you believe that you are actually using FreeBSD. (nMANCEr) When in actuality, you are only using CP/M. (jwhyne) wrong again (nMANCEr) BAH (errata) heh heh. CP/M. (jwhyne) LINUX FOR ME BAAAAAAY BEEEEEE (nMANCEr) I tire of this banter. I have Makefiles and source to modify. (errata) hey, who here is going to the bash? (nMANCEr) errata: I prefer TCSH, sorry. [errata] nMANCEr: oh yeah!? well I prefer ksh! + errata struts his stuff. (nMANCEr) Korn Shell. Bah. (nMANCEr) I've had korn in my shit before. (errata) korn rhymes with porn (nMANCEr) That tells you something about KSH, now doesn't it? (nMANCEr) When/where is this elusive "Bourne Again SHell"? (errata) best.social (nMANCEr) YOU CAN TAKE YER NEWSGROUPS AND SHOVEL 'EM, KSH-BOY (jwhyne) is error 500 in some browser a bandwidth thing? (jwhyne) i.e., used up (PetrDoubt) Yes, could be. (jwhyne) COULD be, what else could it be? i got an angry email here (jwhyne) lookin to kick my ass (nMANCEr) Or perhaps it is merely a software glitch because the user has a virus? I find the most common virus ailing PC's today is a sneaky little bastard known as "MSWIN95" (nMANCEr) Freakin' manager is almost an hour late. (nMANCEr) I'll kill him. (ohseven) nm: hit him in the solar plexus, that way he has a 50% chance of living.. (nMANCEr) THE BASTARD (nMANCEr) I SHALL REIGN DOWN UPON HIS CHILDREN WITH THE POWER OF THE GRAVEYARD SHIFT! (nMANCEr) HIS PROGENY WILL CURSE THE NAME "CHUCK" FOR GENERATIONS, FOR HE SHALL BRING ABOUT THEIR DAMNATION! .x%> Signoff : intensity (fuck pimp) channel #best (jwhyne) fuck pimp (jwhyne) he's talkin about you mark (nMANCEr) He recognizes. * nMANCEr is Pimp incarnate (jwhyne) yep (nMANCEr) I am the full embodiment of pimp. (nMANCEr) I (nMANCEr) AM (nMANCEr) PIMP (nMANCEr) I AM THE GREAT PIMPSTYLE. (nMANCEr) All will bow before my crushed velvet leisure suits and silver canes. (nMANCEr) "Harvester!anarchy@*ba.best.com" you know what friends are to women right? a dick in a glass case with a sign that says "Break glass in case of emergency". (nMANCEr) -> "Harvester!@*" I'd have to rate that among the top ten coolest things I've ever heard in my life. (nMANCEr) So true. (jwhyne) rad (nMANCEr) Harley is a weaver of words. A speaker of the truth. A spinner of the Wheel of Fish. (nMANCEr) bj: Dude, that font you have on your pic is hella cool. (nMANCEr) It's like.. tiny and elite. (bIk_jack) the leeto font (nMANCEr) Sorta like oMi's penis. (nMANCEr) Traffic was good on the way to work tonight. (jwhyne) oh yeah? (nMANCEr) Yes, fool. (nMANCEr) I shall have a ceremony to Freewayunga, the God of Traffic. (nMANCEr) I have prepared 20 virgin McNuggets for sacrificial slaughter. (jwhyne) what about the sauce? (nMANCEr) The ceremonial sauce has been prepared. I shall dip, and they shall die. SAUCE00R E M O R S E 1 8 I N F O F I L ESenior Staff REMORSE 199712 5«F