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it was february 8th, 1997. 3 million doodleboys around the globe had just
gotten out of dOODLEBOYZ(tm) convention in pico looki, a small island in
the bermuda triangle. they all left the convention center in hotwired, stolen,
or shitty cars to go to their carded motel rooms and get some rest. well, all
except 3. those three fellows, seperate at the time, all decided to go  
drinking. because there was only one other building on the island besides
carmilito's convention shack, they all went to the same bar, carmilito's
beer shack, a run down place with a wooden bar and 10 or so tables around 
the room. in the front there was a 90 year old man playing a ukelele, that

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was the pico lookians idea of entertainment. the rest of the patrons were
hooting and clapping for the performer, but sargon, meatpod, and blazemore
sat at seperate ends of the room, shaking their heads in disgust. they all
ordered some sort of drink, and after about an hour or two, they were all
plastered. sargon, who is known for his stumbling and forgetfulness, looked
around, and noticed meatpod sitting at the other end of the bar near a trash
can, puking his brains out. he walked over to him, and said

  sargon: "arent you the guy who stuffed tguardian in the trash can at 
dOODLEBOYZ(tm) convention?"
  meatpod: "uh, yeah.."

so meatpod and sargon, two giants of the ascii scene, stood face to face 
dumbfoundedly.

  meatpod: "uh.. hey"
  sargon: "hey"

so they talked for a while about the latest serial pack, until they saw a 
lonely guy sitting at a table, drawing dollar signs and other computer symbols
on his napkin, trying to pick up chicks.

  blazemore: "hey baby, check out my ascii art.. why dont you draw some ascii 
art on this napkin, maybe.. your phone number?"

the chick walked away disgustedly. meatpod realized that the guy doodling on
the napkin was blazemore, the guy who kept throwing paper airplanes at
the convention.

  meatpod: "woah, thats blazemore!"
  sargon: "who?"
  meatpod: "you shithead, blazemore, the ascii artist for serial!"
  sargon: "uh, whats serial?"
  meatpod: "its that group you run, dumbass, do you have alzheimers, or are yo 
 naturally stupid?"
  sargon: "dunno.."

so they walked over to blazemore, and sat down..
  
  meatpod: "Hey"
  sargon: "hey"
  blazemore: "hey"

now that they had acquainted themselves in the normal doodleboy fashion, they
approached the bar and ordered 6 beers. they talked for a while, and the
bartender presented them with 6 beers. they each guzzled down about half of
their beers, until the bartender looked at them impatiently and spoke.

  bartender: "are you going to pay for that?"
  sargon: "oh shit, i forgot about that.."
  meatpod: "fuck.. blazemore, got any money?"
 
blazemore nodded, and pulled a ziplock bag full of pennies out of his bag 
and threw it on the bar. the bartender shook his head in disapproval..

  blazemore: "this is all i got.."

the bartender then hollered loud, like a banshee, and a huge, 300 pound latino
man named Juan Salazar Martinez Felipe Gonzalez Benitez Rosarez the third jr.
Juan promptly picked up sargon, meatpod, and blazemore and threw them out on
the street. 

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they then got up, and thirstily went up to a water fountain, each guzzled
about a gallon of the foul smelling liquid, and then promptly laid down on
the pavement. meatpod then proceeded to throw up. they laid there for about
30 minutes, until they started to hear a weird noise..

  noise: "data, input! kill, cyborg kill whitetrash!"
  sargon: "what the fuck is that?"
  meatpod: "i dont know, it sounds like my sound blaster talking.."

then, a red and white cyborg appeared from behind the trees. 

cybersys:1> begin query
cybersys:1> query mm
cybersys:1> begin directive
cybersys:1> directive "loop".,..
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cybersys:1> override$g$;;$g$
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cybersys:1> begin directive

the cyborg proceeded over to meatpod and sargon.
  
  cyborg: "message from: The Guardian. 'you have beaten me up and thrown me
  in the trash can one too many times! i have programmed a cyborg, and
he is going to get revenge on every fne of you bitches that fucked
with me!'. message EOF."
  sargon: "oh shit"

the cyborg then picked them up, and threw them about a mile into the sea, where
they drowned..


so.. tguardian got his revenge, and he now owns the scene, as he always claims
he does!
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