ARROGANCE

Sometimes I think that I'm evil and cruel,
Malign and corrupt, foul and impure
And then I think that it's all my fault
That I'm to blame for all that's wrong.

I sit and I think. reflect on my life
All that's gone, what's yet to come.
I sit and I think, wondering how,
What have I been? Who am I now?

The answer's so vague, lost in the mist,
Eluding the grasp of my waking mind.
I wonder, I wonder, what could it be?
Who and what? When and why?

Is it the one from whom I came?
She who holds the rein of my life?
Is it she that smothers with love?
She who's yet to learn to release?

Is it the one I used to trust?
He, my friend, my Blood and Kin?
Is it the one who lost his way?
He whom I tried, and failed, to save?

Is it she that I gave my heart?
The one I loved and held so dear?
Is it she who scarred my soul?
Who stole from me my warmth and care?

I just don't know,
I just can't say!
Damn these thoughts,
Damn your way!

I hate it all. I hate you too.
I hate the world, so cold and cruel.
I hate my life, it's dirt and filth,
But most of all, I hate myself.

Yet, when it all comes crashing down,
When the pipers paid his due,
I'll stand here laughing, laughing loud
At me, At God, the world, and You.

-Adrian Blood